Nick– Pre-Hokkaido, my family unleashed no less than 15 Japanese dictionaries between my birthday and Christmas. The thought only counts for so much, and I packed my bags later that afternoon with two editions: the timeless Oxford and Get Dirtya guide to the underbelly and armpit rot of Japanese vernacular. While every book, tape, and software program teaches you to shake hands and sign contracts, here was a book with some more practical phrases, and a RIDICULOUS amount of cross-cultural humor. A cure-all for awkward silence, and an instant hit amongst the tune shop crowd.
Here’s some gems:
Pick-up lines for femmes and bros
You look kind of like a Japanese Brad Pitt.
anata wa burapi no nihonjin ban da.
You would be super popular in America.
amerika ja zettai moteru yo ne.
Check out my sixpack!
hora fukkin wareteru daro
Various gems for various occasions
Your momma’s bellybutton is an outie!
omae no kachan debeso daa!
Don’t you think this booger looks like you mom?
kono hanakuso tte teme no kachan ni nitene?
I am a pathetic bed wetter.
watashi wa sho mo nai oneshu desu
Why do I so relish the smell of my own farts?
jibun no onara no nioi ga kon’nanimo konomashi no wa naze de aro?
Give peace a chance, man.
heiwa ga ichiban sa
It’s a biker cop!
shirobai da!
Seriously, we’re eating poo.
unko da ne maji de
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